Mine to Lose Read online

  “This is perfect,” I say in hushed tone, before realizing they heard me. I look at Trey apologetically, because he has the ultimate say. But he just nods his head, as if he reads my mind.

  “I think you’re right, Em.” He looks away from me to Jaysen. “This will be great.”

  Jaysen gives us a confident nod, as if he knew it was in the bag, “So what are you going to tell those other florists you were supposed to meet? Because we know, I’m the best.”

  I can’t argue it. In fact, I don’t want to see the others, but we have meetings already scheduled. “We have two more to see, but I will let you know something by the end of the day.” He smiles, and for a second, he appears unsure.

  Trey leads the way toward the entrance but steps aside to let me pass. When I do, his hand accidently brushes mine, causing tingles to run down my spine. But when I look at him his deliberate smile tells me that he knows exactly what he’s doing. There’s nothing I can say about the gesture because he looks over at Jaysen who looks like his eyes are about to pop out. I guess he saw that, too.

  “It was nice to meet you Jaysen. Emogen will call later today to make it official.” And with that, he steps past me and continues walking out the door. I turn to Jaysen with a shock-filled look and he gives me a wide smile.

  When I reach for his hand he pulls me close and whispers in my ear, “What was that all about?” I look at him and shrug, still stunned. “Well, figure it out and let me know. That man is hot.”

  * * *

  We meet with the other two florists, and as suspected, they were ill-prepared, as well. Our meetings with each of them last no more than twenty minutes, one ending when Trey faked an urgent work situation he had to get back for. I am grateful for his white lie, and follow dutifully, since I need to get my client back to the office.

  “Are you hungry?”

  “I’m fine,” I say driving toward the office. “I’ll grab something at the office.”

  “Okay,” he responds. “So what do you and Ryan have planned this weekend?”

  I feel the smile creep onto my face. “We have some wedding details to take care of on Saturday, but other than that, I’m not sure. We’ll probably end up at Wired Spirits, that’s where a few of our friends like to go.”

  “How long has he been gone?”

  “It’s only been a month, but it’s been a really hard month. Thankfully work and my friends have been my saving grace. It’s hard being away from everything you know.” I don’t know why I just shared so much with him, but I don’t feel weird about it.

  “Having friends around is really important,” he says, looking at me a little too intimately. “And working with me won’t be a problem, right?”

  I’m thrown off by his question, because I thought we already covered this, but if I have to say it again, I will. “He doesn’t know that I’m working with you, but it won’t be a issue. Ryan is a great guy, and he’s proud of the work I do. He would never interfere. And he’s not the jealous type, anyway.”

  “Could have fooled me, Em.” The way his voice dips when he says my name causes something to stir inside me.

  Thank God the girls are coming over. A movie and wine is the distraction I need.

  CHAPTER 13

  My evening with the girls was a great time filler while I waited for Ryan to come home. Sitting with my two closest friends, watching Top Gun and eating pizza only got better when Joss decided to turn it into a drinking game. Every time a character in the movie named a call sign, we had to drink, so we were feeling no pain pretty quick. I might have to watch the movie again, you know, just to make sure I remember what happened. I can’t believe my mom never played that one for Langley and me. Hot guys and volleyball, that’s right up her alley.

  I didn’t mention my dream to Joss or Cam; it felt weird to talk about it when it was just that, a dream. And like Lang says, the dream means nothing. Even after spending part of the day with Trey scouting florists, I know that to be true.

  Leaving work early today adds to my excitement that Ryan will be home tonight. I tried calling him this morning, but I missed him, much to my disappointment. He said that he was driving straight to his old office, because his boss wanted a report, so he would meet me at the apartment when he was finished. That works for me, because I didn’t bother cleaning up the pizza boxes or the empty wine bottles from last night.

  I don’t have any of Ryan’s favorite foods at home, so I decide to stop by the grocery store and grab a few things. Hell, maybe I’ll cook lasagna; he’s always liked my recipe. Now I’m on a mission. This is going to be the best weekend ever, no pressure or anything. I start to mentally time how long it will take to start dinner and straighten up the apartment before I should expect him, and I think I’m good to go.

  As I make my way to my apartment door, I am doing my best to balance everything in my arms. Stupid me, wanted to make it in one trip, so my arms are loaded with everything from the store as well as my bag from work. My key is in my hand, and I’m about to slide it into the keyhole when the door opens.

  “Hey, babe,” Ryan says with a beaming smile.

  The bags slip from my hands as I stand in shock before jumping at him and throwing my arms around his neck. I close my eyes and take him in. He’s here with me, holding me, and my heart clenches, knowing I never want to lose this feeling.

  “I guess you’re happy I’m here early?” he asks, while I keep my grasp firm around him.

  “You didn’t answer this morning, I had no idea when you’d be home.” My voice is muffled because my face is buried in his neck.

  “I had a feeling I’d be done early, but I didn’t want to get your hopes up, so I figured I’d wait and see how things ran.”

  I finally release him and he sets me down. I can’t believe the tears welling in my eyes. I knew I was going to be happy to see him, but now, I’m not sure I can let him leave in two days. “I can’t believe you’re here,” I say glancing around the messy apartment, and he follows my gaze.

  “Yeah, I guess you girls had fun last night,” he remarks with a wink.

  “Wine, Top Gun and pizza,” I count off on my fingers. “Not a bad night at all.”

  We walk back to the entry and grab the bags I so carelessly dropped and set everything on the counter. He starts emptying the bags and looks at me. “Were you planning on cooking for me tonight?”

  “I thought about it,” I say coyly, watching as he puts the eggs away in the refrigerator and faces me when he closes the door.

  “What else did you think about?” His voice is low, daring me to play along.

  I walk over to him and extend my hand, grazing his side, but I continue the movement right past him to the boxes sitting on the counter and smile. “That I was just going to take a shower and change.”

  I take the box I grabbed to the small cabinet across the way and stand on my toes, pushing it onto the top shelf. I smile to myself, knowing he’s getting a good look at my ass while I do it. When I face him, he’s still staring at me, with a readable look.

  “Why do you need to change?” He raises his eyebrow in question.

  I look down at my work outfit and point to an invisible spot on the hem. “Well, my dress is dirty,” I say with an innocent shrug.

  Ryan starts moving toward me with slow steps and pins me in the corner between him and the counter. “And the shower?”

  “I don’t really need one, yet.”

  I watch his eyes graze the length of my body, but he doesn’t kiss me, he doesn’t even touch me, there is only the silent, desire-filled look he’s giving me. My stomach is swirling in anticipation, while I try to act unaffected. I try to steady my pulse, but I know he can tell he’s getting to me, and why shouldn’t he? It’s been a month. I move to touch his face, but before my fingers reach him, he pushes off the counter and gives me space that I don’t want at all. His grin is sexy and mischievous, and I want to smack it. Or maybe kiss it.

  Two can play at this game.

&n
bsp; He stands in the other corner across from me, leaning against the counter with his arms crossed over his broad chest, waiting for my move. I compose myself and take a deep breath, before finally moving. I walk to the sink and turn on the water to start washing the dishes from last night, and I can feel his eyes watching every move. I grab a glass and pull the sprayer from the holster to rinse it out, but just as I start to spray, I move out of the way and aim for him, drenching him in one swift move.

  “What the hell, Em?” He stands there looking murderous, and I start laughing.

  “Thought you could use a cold shower,” I say with a shrug, trying to return the sprayer to its place. But he’s behind me in an instant, grasping for my hand that holds it. When he frees the nozzle from my grip, he turns it in his hand and starts spraying, getting both of us wet. I’m screaming, and we’re both laughing as I try to get away, but he holds me in place. I turn in his arms and look up at him, out of breath.

  His face turns serious, the water dripping from his hair and running down his face. The movement of his chest matches mine, rising and falling rapidly. Before I can register the action, his lips are on mine, and he’s pulling me so close, I’m not sure I can breathe, but I don’t care. I return the kiss with equal fervor, throwing my arms around his neck and grasping at his hair that is damp and feels soft between my fingers. He removes a hand from my waist and it glides up, just over my breast, to undo the buttons on the front of my dress.

  “I’ve missed you so much,” he pants, between the kisses he plants on my neck.

  “Me, too,” are the only words I can manage, wishing this dress was easier to get off.

  “Fuck it,” he groans, dropping his hand from the buttons he’s fumbling with and lifting me to sit on the counter next to the sink. Considering how much taller he is than me, I like this view; I can see every emotion and look in his eyes, and I know it’s only for me. He pushes my hair out of my face and begins kissing me again.

  Our hands are tugging and pulling at whatever they can, his pulling the hem of my dress from under me and grazing my thighs that are separated by his waist, mine tugging frantically at the buttons on his shirt. He places a firm hand at the small of my back, urging me closer, but I keep the space, if only for a moment, reaching between us to undo his belt. He trails kisses from my jaw, nipping at my neck, down to my collarbone, and I almost lose function of my hands when I try to pull his shirt over his head. Lucky for me, he helps, but only so he can remove my dress, the last piece of clothing that separates us.

  I’ve missed him more than I would ever have thought, and when he lifts me, my legs wrap around his waist, as though by instinct. In one swift movement, my back is up against the cabinet behind Ryan, and even though it’s not the most comfortable position, I don’t care. His lips are on my neck one moment and nipping at my shoulder the next, desperate to get closer than we already are.

  As we make love, we move in unison, rushed and needy, but it’s what I have missed. I’ve missed him more than I ever thought possible.

  I feel his fingers grip my waist tighter, and as his body stills, he continues to plant kisses at the base of my throat. I’m not sure how long we stand there, breathless and sweating, but he finally breaks the silence and kisses me. I drop my forehead to his as he whispers how much he’s missed me, but all I’m able to do is nod in agreement.

  “Now, you need a shower,” he laughs as he kisses me one final time before setting me on my feet and pulling me toward our bedroom.

  * * *

  After our little private welcome home party last night, we decided dinner was a bust and perused the takeout menus I keep stashed in the end table in the living room. Ryan insisted we stay in for the rest of the night doing absolutely nothing but watching terrible movies and being together. Somewhere between Chinese food and the second movie, I fell asleep comfortably on his chest.

  My alarm goes off at seven this morning, because we have some wedding plans to get out of the way before we go hang out with our friends tonight. Dean knew that Ryan would be in town and insists on going out, so Ryan has me call the girls to see if they want to go out, too. I am a little disappointed, since I had planned on keeping him all to myself this weekend, but I know we’ll have a good time. Our first stop is to see Jaysen; my appointment with him the other day impressed me so much that I tell Ryan we have to use him for our own wedding.

  “Well, I didn’t expect to see you back so soon,” he remarks when we walk through the door. “Another client for me?” he asks, looking at Ryan, who smiles at me.

  “Yes,” I say with a sassy tone. “Me - I mean, us,” I stumble, pointing to Ryan and me.

  “Damn girl.” He eyes Ryan up and down. “Nice job.” I laugh and nod in agreement before discussing what I am looking for in wedding flowers. He is amazing, and by the time we leave an hour later, I am finally able to check the first thing off our wedding list. Ryan appears to be quite impressed with what Jaysen can do, and even more so since he is going to cut us a deal, because I will be bringing more business to him.

  Now, six hours later, I’m exhausted from all of the errands we ran, not to mention the lack of sleep from last night, and all I want to do is crawl back in bed. But everyone is expecting us at Wired Spirits, and the place doesn’t look too crowded, yet. You wouldn’t know from the exterior that this place is one of the more popular bars in the area. It was an old pharmacy that someone renovated into a bar years ago, and it grew to be a local favorite. The lighting is awful, stench of stale beer is in the air and the place reeks of desperation. Men are standing at the bar hoping to pick up women while the ladies try hard to appear unavailable. Regardless, I love this place, if for no other reason than to people watch.

  I walk to the booth in the far corner when I spot Cam and Joss, who are waving their arms as if we can’t see them. Holding Ryan’s hand, I pull him toward the booth and finally get to introduce him to my co-worker.

  “Cam,” I step aside and pull Ryan forward, “this is my fiancé.”

  “It’s about damn time I meet you.” She smiles. “This girl can’t stop talking about you.”

  “That’s good to know,” he says, shaking her hand.

  His body lurches forward and I turn to see Dean standing next to him, slapping him on the shoulder. “What’s up, asshole?”

  They start catching up, and rather than listen to guy talk, I take a seat next to Joss and catch the girls up on the day. I notice Cam keeps looking at Dean and when she realizes she’s been caught, she scrunches her features in embarrassment. “He’s single,” I tell her, answering the question I think she might have.

  “And obnoxious,” Joss interjects, before I bump her shoulder.

  “Only to you, because you’re a bitch, but I love you,” I remind her before turning to Dean. “Hey Dean, come meet my friend. You already know Joss, and this is Cam. We work together.”

  Dean nods at Joss who returns the gesture with equal disdain and then looks at Cam. His eyes grow slightly, before he becomes indifferent again. “Nice to meet you, Cam. So, where ya from?” he asks, taking a seat next to her. The two begin a conversation that Ryan, Joss and I are left out of, so she nudges me to move out of the booth.

  “Let’s go dance,” Joss inclines her head toward the dance floor.

  “C’mon, Ryan.” I grab his hand and drag him along. He’s so great, because as much as he hates dancing, he’ll do it for me. The three of us are on the dance floor, and Joss finds some random to entertain her for a while. I’m not sure how long we stay there moving to the music, but it’s long enough that Ryan and I are hot, sweaty and if we don’t leave the floor now, people might see part two of our reunion. Or would it be four?

  “Let’s get a drink,” Ryan shouts in my ear over the music. I nod in agreement and tap Joss to let her know where we’re going. We make our way to the bar, where Dean and Cam have moved to, still talking and seemingly getting along.

  I lean against the bar, checking out the crowd in front of me. The
room is packed, loud and oozing with drunks, and I’m having a great time. Ryan orders five shots and hands each of us one. We raise our shots to each other and down them in unison. As I lower my glass and open my scrunched eyes, my throat burning from the tequila I have taken in, I start coughing and Ryan is patting me on the back.

  “Emogen?” Trey says, a smile playing in his eyes. “I thought that was you. What are you doing here?”

  Holy crap! What in the hell is he doing here?

  “Oh,” I stammer, still coughing from the shot. “Mr. Miller, how are you?”

  The look he gives me at the use of his title is one of amusement, but he covers it well. “Just enjoying a night out with Vivien,” he says, wrapping his arm around the woman who appears at his side. She doesn’t seem fazed by the gesture, perhaps even numb to it. She’s about my height, thin and muscular, her dark black hair pulled into a tight ponytail. She reeks of superiority, and barely looks in our direction when he attempts an introduction.

  “Nice to meet you Vivien.” I try to meet her eyes, but she looks in every other direction. “I’m sorry,” I add and step back next to Ryan, realizing that everyone is watching this exchange. “Mr. Miller, this is my fiancé, Ryan, and our friends, Dean, Joss, and you already know Cam.”

  “Please, call me Trey,” he rushes, giving me a sideways glance. Everyone gives him a polite nod, except Ryan.

  I begin to worry that he remembers Trey, but then he extends his hand to him. “Nice to meet you, Trey.” His tone isn’t as convincing as the words.